Don't say a word

This particular blog is something that has been on my heart for a while. What I found is that when people don't know what to say they end up saying something silly or hurtful. Listen were all guilty of it. Often times people don't mean it or their just caught off guard of what was said. I would love to elaborate to help educate people on what you could say to a parent of a special needs child versus some things that have been said to me. The one that sticks out and was most hurtful is when someone had realized Cash was autistic and said, "Oh he doesn't look autistic". In my head I was thinking, "You don't look like you want to get punched". LOL, but seriously. I honestly did not respond. I walked away. Upon finding out about Cash she simply didn't have to say a word. Or she could of went with something like this, "Cash seems to be doing well". Thats all, move on. Sometimes when I think about that day, I get angry at myself for just walking away. I could have used that moment to educate her on the correct verbiage to use in situations dealing with special needs parents. However, that's when God started working on my heart to start a blog.

Something else that has happened along the way is one you may not expect. Within the autism community I have connected here and there with some families. Walking away from a conversation I had with another parent I got the vibe that according to their situation with their child that Cash was not "autistic enough". Were those exact words spoken, no. However, I felt during the entire conversation that there was a lot of comparison happening. For instance, "Well he speaks, and my child is not there yet". Or "Oh he knows his letter's, my child does not". First of all, I've never been one for let's compare our children with any of my kids. I'm definitely not going to sit here and debate who is more autistic. And it's not about that. These kids are individuals. Just because you sat with us for 30 minutes you think we have it easier. No one knows what it's like in each household behind closed doors. To compare anyone's situations is wrong. It made me truly uncomfortable. I walked away from this encounter a little defeated. Almost like well "where do we fit in"? Sometimes when he is around a-typical kids it's hard for him to integrate. But when we were trying to connect with special needs kiddos that posed a challenge as well. Since that day I just put in prayer that God would send Cash "all" kinds of friends. God is faithful and has put some amazing friends in Cash's life.